I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid. John 14: 27 NLT
I literally just found out from Instagram that the person i placed as the love of my life is married and expecting. I felt my heart palpitate instantly like it was going to beat out of my chest. I’m sitting here wondering how this all happened. In September you were asking me to relocate to you by January not knowing that you were getting her pregnant the following month. We chose the city you currently live in together, the house, the couch i bet you did the same with her. Oh well as much as I’m heartbroken and hurt, i have decided that i wouldn’t let you run a good month, my month of Grace!
Sometimes i look at my life and see how much of a product of Grace i am. I let the devil put crazy thoughts in my head like how all my friends are having babies and I’m not even in a courtship talk less of a marriage. How most of the ex are married and friends saying oh it could have been you. I begin to ask myself where did i go wrong, where did i miss it? was it my attitude, the way i joke, am i too much of a feminist, a hard worker, did i show too much love, was i being his mummy instead of his partner? God finally said to me look at the girls you call friends, most of them took the shortcut to marriage, you’re on the right track Daughter, you’re doing the right thing. He reminded me of Psalm 46:5 that he is always with me and i cannot fail. I took a few breath, calmed down and played the song ‘you are able’ by Ada Ehi.
This is me letting go of the betrayal, the hurt wishing him well and doing what i do best at being happy and living right for christ. I feel this write up makes it sound easy, but it isn’t. I am a strong believer that everyone must get betrayed in life at least once. If you let it build in your heart, it can destroy your trust in others which can make you loose out on some things in life. As much as the devil use humans to hurt other humans, God uses humans to bless and comfort other humans. That is just how the world works.
So what did i do? I remembered that i had to make faith my buddy because Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. I gradually wiped away the imprints of betrayal in me by getting my mind busy on other things. I genuinely forgave, i removed signs that remained me of who and what hurt me and i slowly but steadily regained faith in myself reminding myself that i know who i am.
What am i saying? You might find yourself in a betrayal situation; remember letting go and forgiving is the best thing you can do to regain your happiness. Even Elsa from Frozen understands letting go!
Always remember, God chose you first!